Laura Buys Skinny Jeans

Last fall One Stop Plus (OSP) - www.OneStopPlus.com - put together a collection they call The Collection, and I watched the fashion show, enthralled. It was an assembly of really beautiful clothing designed expressly for plus size women. The fashions were presented at a live showing, with plus size models (or what the fashion industry, in its infinite wisdom considers plus sized), but the video of the show was available online.

Along with a lot of other plus size viewers, I had a great time critiquing the outfits, saying what I liked and didn’t like about the looks and the individual garments that comprised them. Hated the gladiator sandals. Laughed at the thigh high stockings with the shorts. Some of my dislikes were just a matter of taste, and I could still see merits in the garments, even if I wouldn’t wear them myself. But generally speaking, I saw beautiful clothing, designed in such a way that the various garments appeared to be interchangeable for many lovely and cohesive looks, suitable for a wide range of ages and body types.

Then we had to wait. It takes time to translate from the runway to the store, even if the store is online. Meanwhile the Old Dude and I ran into a cash flow crunch with our business, and I have been trying dutifully not to spend any money. The Collection came available online, and sad Laura looked on wistfully. Oh, well. I have too many clothes anyway. So I told myself. I didn’t believe me.

Then, a couple of days ago, I got an email. The Collection was now half-price! Well, who could resist? Haven’t I been saying that if somebody made It, I would buy It? Time to put your money where your mouth is, girl.

So I now have ordered four of the Looks from the show, plus an additional leather obi in a clay red color – a total of twelve items, pants, shirts, camis, belts, and a dress. I stuck with the blue and green palette. Most notably, I have ordered the gorgeous dress ensemble with the lace top. Turns out it is a lace T-shirt over a sleeveless sheath, with a leather obi belt.

And, at last, I have succumbed to the pressure to buy skinny jeans.

Many people, including those I trust who wear the same size I do, have been swearing by them. I don’t mean jeggings here, which are just wrong for anybody with a little extra on the hips or butt. I mean skinny jeans. So I bought a pair from the Collection, in a lovely shade of blue. They will be worn with tunics and cardigans. We will see how they fit, and how they look. I promise to be rigorous and severe with myself, and critique from all angles. And if I am not pleased, they are so going back.

The problem with online or catalog buying is that you cannot tell fit or quality of finish from the pictures. I know myself pretty well, so I think I chose wisely with respect to proper garments for body type, but we’ll see when I try them on. As I said, if they are not right, back they go. As for the quality – in general I have not been disappointed by OSP. You get what you pay for, here as anywhere else. The original price point on these garments was moderately high, and they moved well on the models in the video, so I am hopeful they will live up to my expectations.

So I am dreaming in blue and green, waiting for my orders to arrive in the mail, and already mentally rooting through my wardrobe to see what else I have that will work with these new babies. If the garments I’ve bought are as interchangeable as I think they will be, I won’t have to wear the same outfit twice all summer!

If I can ever figure out how to post pictures to this thing, you will get to see how successful I was.

Hats

The recent Royal Wedding got me thinking about hats. I concluded that people have forgotten how to wear them.

When I was a very small girl, most people – men and women - still wore hats on a daily basis. Somewhere along the way this has changed. It is strange when you think about it. Hats or headdresses of some kind, both decorative and utilitarian, have been a vital part of an ensemble throughout most of human history. Hats were of course functional, keeping the head warm, the sun off the skull, and one’s hair clean, but they were also important symbols of social status and job function. Additionally, they encouraged (or discouraged) sexual attraction. In fact, all these things still apply, but to a much lesser degree than in even the recent past.

At some point toward the end of the 19^th century it was no longer thought necessary that a woman wear a cap or headdress indoors. However, a woman’s outdoor attire was not complete without a hat, even well into the 20^th century. The hat was the go-to accessory to put the last touches on one’s costume, much the way shoes and bag are today. This began to decline noticeably after World War II, but accelerated in the mid-1960’s. In the early 1950’s, my mother wore a hat whenever she went shopping or visiting. The most memorable for me is the one my brother and I sniggeringly called “Mom’s witch hat” – a conical black faille number that she made from a mid to late-1940’s pattern. She also wore simple pill boxes with suits and dresses. I can’t say any of them were particularly elegant or noteworthy. Mom favored simple, tailored garments with little embellishment. But the hat said, “I am properly dressed. I am respectable.”

One day about 1957 or so I was trolling through the rag bag, and came upon a most enchanting hat. It was a little dark blue straw cap with dark blue veiling and a few crushed pink velvet flowers. When, I asked my mother, would I be able to wear a hat like this? “When you’re a grown up lady,” I was told. Alas. By the time I was “old enough” to wear such a thing, no one my age wore any hats at all, let alone something as feminine, elegant, and alluring as that hat.

We wore hats to church. Mom crocheted berets, and I got stuck wearing the damn things when I was deemed too old for the nylon straw boater with artificial flowers. There were prettier alternatives, of course, but no – it was wear the hated white crocheted beret and white cotton gloves. One was supposed to wear something on one’s head in church. I was taught that this was decided by one of the 4^th century ecumenical councils, probably derived from the opinions of St. Paul, who was rather hard on the female sex. Whatever the reason, the female head must be covered in church. In lieu of a hat, a circlet of lace, a headband, even a hankie atop one’s head was acceptable. It was an early lesson in the importance of symbolism, and in the progressive abstraction of a garment no longer fulfilling its original function. It was also pretty damn silly.

Back to the Royal Wedding. You couldn’t avoid it. I swore I wouldn’t watch, and yet there I was, and enjoying it, too. And, like everyone else, I was mesmerized by The Hats.

Now, Americans believe that The British Wear Hats. Actually, I doubt they wear them any more than we do – it’s just that they have these events, like Ascot or royal weddings, which seem to demand a hat as a ticket, or a badge of some kind. The hats I saw were not simply “hats” – they appeared to be entrance requirements. “It’s royal, so we have to wear strange things on our heads.” With the exception of the Queen, who always gives good hat, most people appeared decidedly self-conscious, as if they knew they looked ridiculous, and couldn’t wait to go home and get those dreadful things off their heads. Many hats resembled satellite dishes – perhaps their wearers relieved the tedium of the event by listening to XM radio, or they may have even had a tiny TV screen concealed inside. It must have been downright painful to sit next to some of those things, not to mention difficult to see what was going on. Even the fascinators, though generally smaller than the hats, were worn with a self-conscious air, and bore little or no relation to the outfits on the bodies beneath.

Of course, the prize for bizarre had to go to that Thing on Princess Beatrice’s head. I thought it looked like an ancient Egyptian hieroglyph, but a commentator referred to it a toilet seat. Did she and her sister set out to embarrass the family because their mother was not invited?

I found the peculiar hats so distracting, that they seemed to me almost disrespectful, as if the wearers were making fun of the event. Is a wedding, even one featuring the future King of England, the place for sartorial irony?

A hundred years ago, when hats were vast and ornate, no chapeaux, however elaborate, would have looked out of place, because their wearers knew how to wear hats. We appear to have forgotten.

Golden Globe Gowns

This morning Kim, my office assistant, and I spent some valuable bonding time critiquing the stars' gowns from last night's awards show. There certainly were some beautiful dresses there. Too bad they weren't always on the right lady. But we both agreed - we are sick of the mermaid dress. With the exception of a few classical columns, and a couple of unfortunate lampshades, that is all one saw. Boring, ladies.

I understand that most of these gals have a stylist to assist them - in fact, most of them don't even own the dresses. So you would expect better choices, wouldn't you? I understand that for some folks, making a big impression trumps taste and elegance, but wouldn't you still want the gown to flatter you? For example, mashed-down boobs in the strapless gowns (looked painful!), and too much cleavage and not enough support in some others. I have no argument with a dress cut to the bellybutton, but figure out some way to get the girls up where they belong in spite of it, or go for something you can wear over a good firm bra. Leave the no-support stuff to the lucky ladies with the perky ones. The awards were not the only golden globes visible.

Don't these poor creatures look in the mirror?

On the other hand, it is gratifying to see that these folks are really just like you and me - only with more money. Cher, honey - you're my age. You look great, but leave off the vampy style. You look like a grandma witch.

I gather that the elements weren't cooperating last night. Having to pose with a big umbrella can be a challenge, especially when you're clutching the train of your dress to your legs because the red carpet is soaking wet. Still, no frowns, ladies. Flash those wonderful smiles that show us why we love you.

My Review of Calliope Crepe Inset Dress

Originally submitted at OneStopPlus

This classic and flattering dress has just enough detail to make it fresh for the new season. Perfect for almost any occasion!

• 3/4 length sleeves. Empire waist. Inset at neckline with pleated details. Stretch. Knit. Imported.
• Rayon/Polyester/Spandex. Machine wash.

Calliope Crepe Inset Dress

Nice dress

By Laura from Fredericksburg, VA on 1/13/2010

 

4out of 5

Fit: Feels true to size

Waist: Feels true to size

Length: Feels true to length

Pros: Flattering, Attractive Design, Nice Color, Comfortable, Versatile

Cons: Cheap Fabric, Thin Fabric, Wrinkles Easily

Best Uses: Wear To Work

Describe Yourself: Classic Dresser

Comfort vs Style: Style Driven

Nice dress, but fabric is disappointing. Would be nice to get it without all the wrinkles.

(legalese)

My Review of Knit Crossover Sundress

Originally submitted at OneStopPlus

This basic sundress with a flattering fit is a must have for your resort wardrobe.

• Sleeveless. Crossover neckline. Smocked empire waist with slight ruching. Knit. Stretch. Imported.
• Polyester/Rayon/Spandex. Machine wash.
• Approx 42 1/2" long.
• Wom...

Knit Crossover Sundress

Lovely dress

By Laura from Fredericksburg, VA on 1/13/2010

 

5out of 5

Fit: Feels true to size

Waist: Feels true to size

Length: Feels true to length

Pros: Versatile, Nice Fabric, Comfortable, Attractive Design, Flattering, Nice Color

Best Uses: Night Out, Casual Wear, Wear To Work

Describe Yourself: Classic Dresser

Comfort vs Style: Style Driven

Lovely color, great fit, the bodice is excellent, no gaps in the neckline.

(legalese)

Time is Not On My Side

Multiple ideas for blogs, but the demands of making a living have kept me from writing; I am stealing a few moments now.

Have you seen all the purple and violet in the stores? I love it! Being a redhead, I can pull it off really well, but purple is a good color for lots of people, and the right shade makes a good "neutral" - you can put all kinds of colors with it.

One small observation. Out to dinner last night. Yes, it was a bit chilly, but this is Virginia, not Montreal. I wore the same embroidered silk mandarin-style jacket I'd worn all day in the office. It was perfectly fine for going from car to restaurant. I had to laugh at all the people who had already broken out the fur-trimmed parkas and winter coats. I mean, c'mon, people! Don't your cars have heaters? Particularly in light of all the cute jackets, sweaters, and coat-length sweaters available this season. Or just layer, for heavens sake. "But it's co-wuld out there!" No, it's not, fool. A mild nip in the air is all it was, no matter what the TV weatherman said.

Hrrrrrrumph!

Over dinner last night I told my husband, Eddie, about my new blog. "It's called 'Clothing is Candy' I told him happily. He thought about that between bites of his lamb kofte. Then his face lit up.

"Is it about edible panties?" he asked hopefully.

Men.